Do You Feel…?Posted: November 26, 2012
Honestly, I don’t really remember when he started doing it, but something Nick does on a very regular basis has helped me to maintain so much peace and clarity. A few times a week, usually when we’ve collapsed into the bed after a long day, Nick will start into a list of questions:
- Do you feel safe?
- Do you feel loved?
- Do you feel cared for?
- Do you feel happy?
- Do you feel provided for?
This process of questioning is something that Nick has gleaned from a variety of spiritual leaders who surround him. I’m so thankful he decided to take their lead and bring this same series of questions into our relationship. It helps me to pause and really think about my answer. The truth is, my answer is always yes to each of the questions. There’s something about answering each of these questions with a confident and resounding “yes” that helps me to gain some perspective. If I feel safe, loved, cared for, happy, and provided for that’s really all that matters…not the dirty dishes in the sink, the floor that needs vacuuming, the bed that didn’t get made, the pounds that weren’t lost, the to-do list that wasn’t fully conquered, the stitches that weren’t sewn perfectly straight, and the list goes on… As a stay at home mom, it is easy for me to get wrapped up in the cycle of perfection. Because this is a standard I set for myself, I often project those expectations onto myself on the behalf of those around me. This leads me to feel frustrated, overwhelmed, and sometimes ashamed when I don’t accomplish what I intended or with the level of excellence I expected. But when I collapse into bed feeling beat down because I didn’t meet my unachievable goals and am met with a loving husband that genuinely cares to know and make sure that I’m safe, loved, cared for, happy, and provided for, it instantly melts the pressure I had been putting on myself to perform.
In this way, Nick has been a beautiful example of my relationship with the Father. Because of Him, I am always safe, loved, cared for, happy, and provided for regardless if the wonderful people I’m surrounded by on this earth help me to feel this way. It’s become a quick mental checklist for me to scroll through when my life feels chaotic, overwhelming, frustrating, or just “blah.” When I can pull back and focus on the reality of the wonderful place that I am in, the “big” things around me quickly become meaningless.
Maybe you don’t have someone in your life who will ask you these questions and work their hardest to make sure your answer is “yes.” But you do have a Father who cares for you. As His child, your answer can always be “yes.”
Do you feel safe?
1 Those who live in the shelter of the Most High
will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
2 This I declare about the Lord:
He alone is my refuge, my place of safety;
he is my God, and I trust him.
3 For he will rescue you from every trap
and protect you from deadly disease.
4 He will cover you with his feathers.
He will shelter you with his wings.
His faithful promises are your armor and protection.
5 Do not be afraid of the terrors of the night,
nor the arrow that flies in the day.
6 Do not dread the disease that stalks in darkness,
nor the disaster that strikes at midday.
7 Though a thousand fall at your side,
though ten thousand are dying around you,
these evils will not touch you.
8 Just open your eyes,
and see how the wicked are punished.
9 If you make the Lord your refuge,
if you make the Most High your shelter,
10 no evil will conquer you;
no plague will come near your home.
11 For he will order his angels
to protect you wherever you go.
12 They will hold you up with their hands
so you won’t even hurt your foot on a stone.
13 You will trample upon lions and cobras;
you will crush fierce lions and serpents under your feet!
14 The Lord says, “I will rescue those who love me.
I will protect those who trust in my name.
15 When they call on me, I will answer;
I will be with them in trouble.
I will rescue and honor them.
16 I will reward them with a long life
and give them my salvation.
Psalm 91 (New Living Translation)
Do you feel loved?
38 And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love.
39 No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 8:38-39 (New Living Translation)
Do you feel cared for?
29 What is the price of two sparrows—one copper coin? But not a single sparrow can fall to the ground without your Father knowing it.
30 And the very hairs on your head are all numbered.
31 So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows.
Matthew 10:29-31 (New Living Translation)
Do you feel happy?
…All who seek the Lord will praise him.
Their hearts will rejoice with everlasting joy.
Psalm 22:26 (New Living Translation)
7 The Lord is my strength and my shield;
my heart trusts in him, and he helps me.
My heart leaps for joy,
and with my song I praise him.
Psalm 28:7 (New International Version)
21 He will once again fill your mouth with laughter
and your lips with shouts of joy.
Job 8:21 (New Living Translation)
Do you feel provided for?
19 And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:19 (New Living Translation)
Now…REST…because you are His child, you are safe, loved, cared for, happy, and provided for…