The Cat HairPosted: June 30, 2008
This was a guest blog that I did on Nick’s blog before I joined the blogging world…ENJOY 🙂
Hey everyone…this is Amy, Nick’s blushing bride. I’ve decided to make an apperance as a guest blogger to try my hand at this cyber world that consumes everyone’s time. We’ll see how this turns out…you never know…maybe my blogging world will expand from twitter to blogspot.
So let me start out by saying, I hate cats. I’ve always been deathly allergic to cats so this would be the primary reason for my hatred toward cats; however, the fact that they pee in a box, rule the roost, and have a secret way of captivating their owners and forcing them to believe that they have personalities and feelings really sets me over the edge. My typical experience around cats is putting on a fake smile and making some very genuine, heartfelt comments about how beautiful this particular cat(s) is and how it is much prettier, smarter, and more perfect than any other cat I’ve ever seen and I’m sure that if I wasn’t deathly allergic, I would adopt it if I had the chance and let it have full rights to my house…sleeping atop the dishwasher, leaping across the china cabinet, filing its paws on the back of my new chair… After about 30 minutes to an hour, I start to sneeze, wheeze, break out in hives…nothing major, just life threatening symptoms that leave me feeling that I’ve been beat with a stick and covered in itching powder.
So, on Friday, the Deaf Education department at our school took a field trip to one of our interpreter’s ranch. She and her husband run a therapeutic horseback riding center from their home and graciously open it up once a year for us to bring our students. The stable/corral that we were in had some barn cats that, in typical cat fashion, lounged around on any flat surface that wasn’t already occupied. I sat down in a chair to take pictures of and watch my students enjoying a horseback riding adventure that they might not have otherwise been able to experience. Little did I know, this was the long-haired cat’s favorite resting place. Earlier that day, I had been wearing a hoodie, but by this time, I had gotten too hot and taken it off and tied it around my waist. For future reference for all you cat owners out there, if your cat has a shedding problem and has left an excess of hair on a favorite chair of yours, it is not necessary to use any other cleaning method besides tying a hoodie around your waist and sitting in the chair for just a few minutes at the most. The hoodie is guaranteed to pick up at least 75% of the hair the first time your posterior makes contact with the chair.
Anyway, after a long, eventful school day, I was grabbing all of my belongings…teacher tote, computer, purse, phone, keys, and oh yeah, don’t forget the hoodie. Because my hands were full, I decided the best way to carry my hoodie would be to fling it over my shoulder. Almost immediately, my right eye started to burn and itch with an intensity that is unexplainable. I got down to the office and had to tell my principal one thing before I left. She took one look at me and said, “Oh Amy! Your eye! It looks terrible!” I assured her that I was well aware of the condition of my eye and was going straight home to douse it in some Visine. I got in my car and picked up my phone to return a missed call from my mom and started to explain to her the eye situation. As I was pulling out of the parking lot, I happened to catch a quick look at my eye. Much to my surprise, my actual eyeball was swelling out of the eye socket! My contact was still in my eye, but my eyeball was swelling all around it! When I blinked I could feel my eyelids squishing my eyeball! I started freaking out and trying my best to inform my mom about the HORRIFIC condition of my eye. She kept suggesting I get some eyedrops…I kept repeating to her, “Mom, I don’t know if you understand…my eyeball is swelling out of my eye socket!” In a matter of seconds, I had convinced myself that my eyeball was going to eventually explode, I would lose my eyesight and, therefore, lose my job as a Deaf Education teacher and would definitely have to drop out of my Masters of Reading program because of my blindness. I got off the phone with my mom and called Nick, who had just flown back in from being gone for a week to DC on business, and informed him that something was seriously wrong and he needed to meet me at Broken Arrow Urgent Care as I was driving myself there as quickly as possible, with one eye open and one eye closed, in a last ditch effort to save my eye and my vision.
I also called Karen on my way to Urgent Care to inform her, over voicemail, that our plans for later that evening might have to be postponed because my vision and therefore, my career and in fact, my life, was on the line. I can only imagine what it must have been like for her to get that message…she probably didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. When I finally got to the clinic, I walked up to the counter and informed the nice lady that I needed help because I was having a major allergic reaction in… She looked up and said, “Oh…your eye…” Yes, my eye. I must say, I was very impressed with the speed, efficiency, and cleanliness of this clinic. I would recommend it to anyone. Within a few minutes of being there, Nick walked in and found me in the waiting room, my head in my hands. I showed him my eye and he did a very good job containing his utter disgust.
The nurse finally called me back to a room and took my vitals. I’m shocked that they didn’t have to rush me to the hospital due to my blood pressure being through the roof. Much to my surprise, my blood pressure was within normal range. I guess my body is just used to being in a constant state of intensity… After a few minutes, there was a knock at the door and in typical Karen fashion, she had altered her plans and taken a detour to the BA Urgent Care to come and plead the blood of Jesus over my swollen eye. At this point, I had started to realize how hilarious it must be for all parties involved. I started to loosen up a little bit and think about how much I had freaked out and all the things I must have said over the phone to my loved ones during my panicked driving from west Tulsa to BA. I realized that I was going to be just fine and had just made a complete fool out of myself. Oh well, at least my friends/family love me, right?
So the doctor comes in, looks at my eye and immediately confirms that my prediction is right, I am having an allergic reaction. He explains that he will give me a steriod shot in my hip and do a sweep of my eye to make sure the hair, if in fact it was a cat hair, was still in my eye. The nurse came in to give me the shot, and I swear he pulled back and jammed that needle in me as hard as he could. In my mind, the impact of the needle forced me several inches across the bed. Let me just say, the flu shot freaks me out…this shot…wow, it puts the flu shot to shame. Next, the doctor came in, put several drops of a numbing medicine in my eye and then put some dye in my eye. He turned off the lights and swept my eye with a blacklight. After a little bit, he said, “Oh, there it is!” and proceeded to pull a LONG cat hair from my eye. Because of the black light, I could see the hair as it was being pulled from eye and it felt like the doctor was removing an entire layer of film off of my eye. I felt immediate relief and felt very vindicated in my trauma when the doctor informed me that this 1-2 inch cat hair had been wrapped around my eyeball! Within an hour or so, my eyeball was completely back to normal and everything was okay.
Wow, folks, this is the exact reason that I haven’t started a blog. What should have taken me 10 minutes and 2 paragraphs has now turned into an hour long novel. I feel like I should offer some wonderful lesson that I learned from this situation so here is my attempt:
1. My husband is wonderful. He dropped what he was doing, met me at Urgent Care, and mangaged to stifle his laughter until after I uttered my first giggle.
2. I have amazing friends and family. Mom, thank you for trying to talk me through a very stressful situation without laughing…too hard… Karen, thank you for considering my situation as serious as I did and being willing to make a detour to come and pray for me.
3. I am an amazing driver. I managed to make it from Peoria to Lynn Lane with one eye, one hand (the other was holding my phone), and occupied mind without causing a wreck.
4. I have got to lighten up.
Until next time…if there is one….